Dean approaches you house nervously, straightening his shirt for the sixth time since he left home. He knocks on the door tentatively, not wanting to cause a disturbance with your family.

Right after you knock the door opens. Alex is standing there in just a worn pair of jeans. He looks... better than he did at the train, much better than he did in the art room. He looks at you for a second, his eyes no longer having that empty and dull look, before he steps thru the doorway and pulls you into a tight hug, pressing his lips to yours quickly and then to your cheek. "Gods..."

Dean stiffens for a moment, not expecting the close physical greeting. He relaxes slightly as your lips press to his cheek, and his arms move around you instantly, pulling you closer. "I'm here, love." he whispers very softly against your ear, fingers caressing the side of your face lightly.

Alex leans back from slightly and looks at you. His eyes are bloodshot from lack of sleep and his skin is paler than usual, but at least there's a presence in his eyes. He smiles weakly, softly. "Thank you." Before leaning to kiss you softly, lips moving against yours.

Dean kisses you back lightly, but pulls away before too long, concern etched on his face. "I've been so worried about you, baby." his fingers tickle across the side of your face as his eyes drink you in, mentally noting your red eyes.

"I know." He meets your eyes, and bites at his lip. "I know you were. And I just... it was like I wasn't even there when I couldn't respond to you. And you took care of me..." He shakes his head. "I didn't deserve it." As he speaks you'll notice his tone isn't dull any more. It's not his normal voice by any means, too low and laced with something hard for that, but he's there.

"I love you, angel. I'd do anything for you." he continues to carress your cheek lightly, pulling you back in for a tight embrace. "Gods, but I've missed you." he sighs in relief, just having you near has settled some of his worries.

"I love you." The first time he's said that to anyone that it hasn't been by rote since Thursday. He hugs you back and then steps away, taking your hand. "Come inside?"

Dean smiles gently at you, lacing his fingers in your own, before looking arouns a bit nervously. "Are you sure I should be here, love?" he whispers very softly, not wanting to disturb anyone.

Alex looks around too, pulling you in and closing the door. He takes his wand, which must been in his back pocket and wards the door before turning back to you. "It's... well, it will be fine. I'll tell my parents tomorrow." Then he laughs softly, but it has a bitter edge. "You'll get to see my childhood room. I haven't had to sleep here since I was 11."

Dean looks at you worriedly, automatically noticing your change in behavior. "Love, maybe you need to sleep just a bit." he looks at you critically, masking it with a smile. "Will you sleep some for me?"

Alex looks down at his feet and then back up at the door. "I made my parents let me start warding it..." As if that were an explanation of some type though he knows it isn't. He turns his eyes back to you. They're saddened. "I'm so very glad you're here, love...I'll... I'll try. " Taking your hand again and turning, leading you toward a short staircase.

"Maybe it'll help you sleep if I'm here." he says almost to himself, following you up the stairs slowly. Dean squeezes your hand gently as he continues to watch you carefully.

Alex nods. It's non-committal. He doesn't want to talk about what happened when he tried to sleep last night. At the top of the stairs he opens the door to a small bedroom, decorated in blues and silvers, posters of soccer teams on the walls. Most definately the room of a 11 year old boy. He walks in and sits on the bed, pulling you down with him.

Dean sits next to you slowly, pulling you in for a tru embrace, his arms wrapping around you protectively. "I love you, baby. I'm always gonna be here for you." he kisses the top of your head very lightly.

Alex nods again, wrapping his arms around you and then leaning close, dropping his head to your shoulder. He's tense still, but not shivering like he had been the entire time on the trian. "I know you will, love." And his voice still has that edge. It's almost unnoticable.

"Tell me what you want to do, love." he whispers again, kissing your cheek. "Would you like me to lay with you and see if you can get some sleep? Or maybe you'd like me to read something to you?"

He shakes his head. "No... just..." He lays down on his side and pulls you down to face him, one arm lazy around your waist and the other cupping your neck. "Just hold me?"

"Of course, love. Anything for you." Dean snuggles down against the duvet, trying to get comfortable for a moment. His arm slips around your waist firmly, pulling you flush up against him. "Is this okay, hun?"

"Perfect..." He sighs. "I snapped at you Friday. I'm sorry..." Dropping his forehead against yours and running his thumb lightly along your jawline.

"Baby, I don't want to hear you apologizing for anything." he whispers sternly. "You didn't do anything wrong. Now, not another word about it." he kisses your cheek softly, tightening his arm around your waist.

A grin tugs at the corners of his mouth, and he looks into your eyes. "Okay..." Turning his mouth to catch yours, the kiss soft - just a bit of desperation behind the way his lips move against yours.

Dean kisses you back softly, not entirely happy with the situation. He's not sure that this kind of intimacy is something you need right now. Reluctantly, he pulls away from you, kissing your cheek instead. "Maybe we should just lay like this and see if you can sleep some, hun."

Alex leans away. Consciously he knows it's not a rejection, but that doesn't stop his expression from tightening a bit - it feels like one. He snorts softly, self-depricating, and forces a small smile. "Okay..." Softly. He sighs and rolls onto his back, then onto his other side, away from you, pulling you close against his back and pressing your hand to his chest.

Dean frowns slightly. "Baby...I didn't mean it that way. Look at me please." he sniffles slightly, trying to hold back his own emotions in this whole mess he's just made.

It's the sniffling that gets to him, and he does turn to lay on his back and look up at you. "I know..." Closing his eyes and then opening them again and running a hand to your cheek. "I just wanted to be close to you."

"And I want to be close to you as well...I just thought that maybe...hell, I don't know what I was thinking." he sighs, pulling you back onto your side, facing him.

"It's okay... I'm just..." He closes his eyes again and leans his forehead against yours. "The last few days I've been acting on instinct. Just haven't let anyone touch me... and now it's like I can't get close enough." He shivers involuntarily and leans closer to you. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't upset me. I just felt that I was pushing something on you that was maybe...too much." he sighs, kissing your nose. "I don't want to do something you're not ready for, hun"

"You never push me." He sighs and pulls you close to him, dropping his head onto your shoulder and holding you. "I know you must be having to walk on eggshells around me."

Dean smiles slightly. "Only because I love you." he chuckles softly. "I've missed you so...just didn't want to ruin it."

"Ruin what?" Spoken against your shoulder. Alex is tugging your shirt from your trousers, but he makes no move to pull it off, just slides his hands underneath it to your back, the need to feel your skin suddenly overwhelming, and pulls you closer against him.

Dean smiles contentedly for the first time in days, feeling overjoyed at receiving your touch again. "I love you, my angel." he whispers breathily against your ear. "I want to take care of you now, okay?"

"Okay..." He leans back and looks at you, blinking red-rimmed eyes. "You know I trust you." Voice still jagged.

"Good." Dean smiles, leaning in slowly and captures your lips with his own. "If I'm going to take care of you, that means you must try to sleep tonight. I'll lie with you."

Alex leans into the kiss almost hungrily, and when you pull away to speak again sighs, then nods. "Alright, I'll try."

"If you want to stay up for a while first, that's fine. Whatever I can do to help you relax, just let me know." His fingers wander down your sides lightly, stopping at the waist of your trousers. "Love you more than anything."

Alex sighs again and presses toward your hand as it moves, his eyes fluttering closed. He can't help the urge to turn and drops a kiss to your jawline, and he'd ask but the rejected feeling from earlier lingers. "Love you... I'll try."

Dean leans forward to whisper against your ear. "Is there anything I can do right now to help you relax?" his lips brush against your earlobe softly. "Anything at all?"

Alex shivers again, the breath against his ear almost too much. He tightens his arm around you, pressing himself full against your body, his arousal pressing against your leg. "Love me." Voice still jagged, but begging.

Dean takes a deep breath, determined to keep control of himself as your length presses against him. "Are you sure, baby?" he whispers, eyes full of nothing but love and concern.

"Please." He slides one hand to your neck and presses even closer against you. "I want you as close as you can be and..." He breaks off, recognizing the desperation in his own voice and hating it. "Please."

Dean looks at you once more before leaning in to press his lips against yours once more. This time, he takes the opportunity to deepen the kiss, his tongue flicking out over your lower lip. His hands wander over your back gently, pulling you closer yet.

Alex groans into the kiss and returns it, his own kiss desperate and needy, hands roving over your back as if trying to memorize the curve of your muscles.

Dean cups your cheek with his hand, his lips still moving against yours slowly. "Baby, slow down. Let me make love to you." he whispers, gently pulling your shirt free from your trousers.

Alex takes a deep breath and tries to slow down, dropping his hands to his side and rolling onto his back again, reaching to drag his shirt over his head and then looking up at you. "Gods yes.." Voice low, eyes needy.

Dean rolls over further, his open hand tracing the countours of your chest and stomach slowly. He straddles your waist and scoots down a bit more, leaning forward to place tiny kisses over every inch of skin he can reach. His tongue flicks over one nipple lightly before covering it, too in kisses and small nips.

Alex moans softly, incoherent words at the back of his throat. He grips the duvet in his hands, trying not to force this to rush, but god he wants to.. needs you close.

"Love... missed you so... god.." Words laced with hunger, with just a touch of pain.

"Missed you too..." he mumbles quickly before slowly licking a long patch of taut skin above your navel. His kisses move lower, halting right above the snap to your trousers. "Are you still okay?" he whispers against your stomach.

"Yes." It's a hiss, quick and feral. He moves one hand to your hair quickly, and then back to the duvet, closing his eyes and willing himself to calm down... to recognize that you're not going anywhere.

Dean sighs softly, his breath ghosting over your skin lightly. He merely moves down further, kissing your arousal through the trousers. his fingers playing lightly over your legs, exploring every inch of you slowly.

"Dean." The word more a moan than any thing else. He writhes and tries not to push up against you, to let you set the pace, but fails miserably.

Dean quickly grabs your hips in both hands, steadying you until you settle back down. Tenatively, his fingers move back up, flicking the snap open quickly and easing the zipper down. He kisses the soft skin as the zipper reveals it slowly, his lips continuing to move just as slowly as before.

Alex grips the duvet so hard he absently thinks that his knuckles must be turning white, but he doesn't press up to you again. Instead he drops his head back against the pillows and clenches his eyes closed, focusing on your mouth and on not writhing too much.

With a smile, Dean lifts your hips up, quickly pulling your jeans and trousers over your hips. He scoots backward off the bed, pulling your pants down and off completely as he stands up. He takes a moment to let his eyes roam over your body, his mind registering just how much he's missed being close to you like this. With a deep breath, he crawls back up the bed, leaning over you on all fours and leaning down for a sweet, lingering kiss. "I love you...more than anything." he whispers against your lips before leaning back in to deepen the kiss.

Alex inhales as you kiss him, raising one hand to slide into your hair and pull you closer, the other rising to rest on your chest, over your heart, against your shirt. The sweetness of the kiss calms him somewhat, his fingers massaging against your neck. He tugs at the your shirt lightly. "Love, need you..." Softly pleading.

"And you shall have me, love." Dean purrs against your lips. He lowers himself back down until his lips are level with the head of your cock. His tongue flicks out to catch a single drop of pre-come off before taking your length into his mouth, slowly taking it into his throat.

Alex tenses, just barely stopping himself from yelling with the thought that he didn't cast charms, and his parents are downstairs. A brief sad thought that Maggie wouldn't have cared if he yelled out, but he pushes that away, forcing himself to focus on your mouth on him. His hand scrables at your shoulder, tugging at your shirt. "Gods.. Dean, please..."

Dean smiles and takes more of your length into his throat, groaning deeply as he watches you writhe in pleasure. He scrambles around for his wand with a free hand, lying it next to you.

Alex moans and writhes below  you, pressing his hips up and at the same time still scrambling to pull at your shirt. "Gods.. Love, want you in me.." Eyes clenched closed and trying to stay away from the edge... so close already and he wants to be one with you when he comes.

Dean pulls away from you slowly, flicking his tongue over the head one last time. He picks up the wand, muttering a quick lubricating charm as two newly slickened fingers slide within you, twisting gently.

Alex groans loudly, then bites his lip to keep from doing it again. "Gods. Dean." Pushing back toward your fingers, he opens his eyes and catches yours. "Love me."

Dean whimpers as the last of his resolve shatters. He slips a third finger inside you, making sure you're carefully prepared before pushing his trousers off quickly and coating his length. "Love you, angel." he whispers softly as his cock presses at your entrance, the head barely breaching the tight muscles there.

"Love you...t-too.." He gasps, throwing his head back and clenching his eyes again, his breath coming quick and shallow as he feels you press into him. He's missed this.. needed this. But as much as he wants to he can't force himself to relax. He tugs idly at your shirt, wanting to feel you completely naked against him, and raises his hips, not yet sliding his legs around your hips, but wanting to give you room.

Dean pulls his shirt off quickly, tossing it to the floor as he lays fully on top of you, letting himself push into you slowly as he does. "Slow down, love...." he carresses your cheek softly. "I'm not going anywhere" he coos gently, waiting for you to calm.

Alex shivers at that and wraps his arms tight around you, his legs coming up loosely around the backs of yours. "No, you're not." And his voice is harder than it has been. He leans to drop kisses across your shoulder and bites lightly there, trying not to press down onto you.

Dean looks worriedly at you out of the corner of his eye, still thinking that perhaps this isn't the best thing for you to be doing. He knows that you'll resent him in the morning. He sighs softly and begins to pull back out of you slowly as he keeps his gentle rhythem deliberately slow.

Alex closes his eyes. This is what he's wanted, and god it feels good to have that contact. But he wants more. He scratches his fingers along your back and bites into your shoulder again, pressing back toward you. "Ohh, love, please... more.." Voice pleading again.

Dean shivers as your fingernails dig into his skin. He continues to rock into you slowly, but his thrusts becoming deeper as he moves. "Just be calm, love." he kisses your cheek quickly, desperately trying to control himself.

"Don't want to be calm." He clenches his eyes closed and scratches at your hips, trying to pull you into him faster, groaning softly as you get deeper. "Please, baby."

Dean almost weeps inside as you urge him on; he can't decide whether grief or lust is what's motivating you. Silently, he complies, his thrusts becoming faster and deeper. His hand slips between you, squeezing your length firmly as he strokes quickly.

And that's all it takes when he's in this state, he presses down against you almost animalistically once, throwing his head back and groaning, and when you hand touches him he shudders, spilling himself over your fingers. "Fuuuck." Gasping for breath.

Dean watches you in surprize, never seeing you climax this quickly before. He draws out of you quickly, pulling you into a gentle embrace instead. "I love you."

Alex is shuddering in the aftermath, but pulls you close. "You didn't..." trailing off as another tremor shakes him, but sliding a hand to wrap around your cock. "Don't you want..."

"This is about you, love. Not me." he brushes your hand away gently and pulls you into his arms.

"Oh..." He slides his hand to your hip and moves closer into you, covering your mouth with his softly, then pulling away.

"Are you...okay?" he whispers, eyes full of concern again. He feels guilty for what he's done...almost as if he's taken advantage of you badly.

He nestles his head into your shoulder, kissing it softly and then twining his legs with yours, curling himself into you. "Of course I am." But that edge is back in his voice. "I love you."

Dean sighs in defeat. "Will you try to sleep, hun?" he whispers, the guilt reigning. "I want you to at least try. "

Alex nods against your shoulder, knowing that you're not happy but not knowing what he can do to fix it or apologize. "I'll try." Kissing your shoulder again. "I love you so much...."

Dean sighs and rolls off the bed, tucking the duvet up around you tightly. "Go to sleep then, hun. I just want to look out the window for a while." he murmers, kissing your cheek softly before crossing the room to the window.

[fin.]